Whaddya MEAN I'm Cancelled???

First, no, Thinking Hard is NOT being cancelled. It's just a clever title. You may now resume breathing normally. Now, to the gritty that is nitty...it's spring, and that means it's time for TV networks to start swingin' the ol' axe (cutting letters off the ends of words, apparently) and changing schedules for the fall. That means picking up new shows that may or may not be completely terrible. That also means cutting current shows. So I took a moment to check out ign.com to see which of my favorite shows got cut...and which totally obnoxious shows will continue to haunt my television for yet ANOTHER season. CBS cut a few dramas and a "comedy" from its line-up. The *ahem* "comedy" in question is Rob, that half-hour thing with Rob Schneider. Is he still a thing? (this is my new thing...calling things out that aren't still things) Seriously, what did that show do...3 episodes? I'm convinced Rob and co-star Cheech Marin CAN be funny...just probably not together. CBS also cut Unforgettable (which WAS a pretty good crime drama), A Gifted Man and something called NYC 22. Um, oh yeah, and CSI: MIAMI!!!! David Caruso=GONE! And now, a moment of the exact opposite of silence for the show... CW dropped Sarah Michelle Gellar's comeback, Ringer. Seriously, the creators of the show made our dreams come true by doing a show with TWO Sarah Michelle Gellars...but NOT A SINGLE VAMPIRE?? C'mon, CW! Also, the network cut The Secret Circle, a drama about witches (I think). Now THAT would've been a great show for TWO SARAH MICHELLE GELLARS! ABC dropped four dramas: The River (which didn't really seem like it would come back anyway...it really had a miniseries feel to it), Pan Am (Dear ABC, you can NOT pull off a Mad Men-like show on the same night as Mad Men. Not gonna happen), Missing (Ashley Judd will soon reprise her role as "cheering trophy wife" in the it's-only-in-her-mind series My Husband Is A Big-Time Race Car Driver Yee-Haw) and GCB, which ABC had planned to be hot and saucy enough to cover for the departure of Desperate Housewives. Apparently it's easier to believe there are murders and affairs in suburbia than a bunch of hot hick women in the south. "Damn! If I sawr a laydee here'n in the south that looks like these laydees on the TEEvee, I'd cut back on the meth!" Speaking of, it looks like TBS will pick up the Courteney Cox sitcom Cougar Town from ABC. They can air it between reruns of Tyler Perry's Seriously, I'll Do Anything To Make You People Laugh, I Have No Shame. NBC dropped a few "meh" comedies to make way for what I'm sure are MORE "meh" comedies. The network cut randomly-named and sporadically-advertised shows Best Friends Forever and Bent. Also getting cut: Are You There, Chelsea? Seriously, when that show was renamed to be better for the censors from the original title (of her book as well) Are You There, Vodka? It's Me Chelsea, that was all she wrote. Also, it was really only niche-funny. And NBC cancelled the unusual crime drama Awake, in which a producer on the show also starred as a cop who found himself flipping between two different realities and finding things that help him solve crimes in the other reality. Y'know, kind of like when I dream of ways to kill my boss. Finally, Fox. (pleasecancelIdolpleasecancelIdolpleasecancelIdol) ....Aaaaaand Idol is STILL on the schedule. Fuckers. Even worse, the network killed The Finder and Alcatraz. Finder was quirky and enjoyable, but given a crap-tacular slot on Friday nights (whaddya mean it couldn't compete with SHARK TANK??). Alcatraz was well-written (by the guy who wrote Lost...so I'm sure seasons 3, 4 and 5 of the show would have been a ridiculously mish-mash of confusing ideas and too-open-ended finales) and I'm sorry to see it go as well. Well, that's it. Now we can look forward to the new shows and bet on which one of them gets canceled first. The CIRRRRRCCCLLLLLLLEEE, The Circle Of LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIFE! -B-