Don't You Know Your "Alice in Wonderland?"

Only CRAZY people host tea parties!

This is a public service announcement from your friends at Thinking Hard: Your taxes are now officially late. Maybe THAT'S why a crapload of people took the day off being PRODUCTIVE at work Thursday to take part in special Tax Day Tea Party Protests. Wait, no...I'm being told those people are unemployed...or so rich, they only have to work two days a year. Yes, the biggest group of people I've ever seen SO interested in bagging tea protested all across the country this week. They're upset about government taxes and spending, which is SO different from the past 200+ years...because now they have a sponsor: Fox "News." Hey, if anyone should be pissed off about the federal taxes, it should be President Obama. Like many others, he paid about 1/3 of his income to the IRS...which came out to about $1.8 MILLION DOLLARS! Holy shit! Hey, the next time I bitch about paying the feds $1,000, somebody punch me in the face. You can practice at the tea party protests in YOUR neighborhood.

Actually, there's another "tea party" movement starting...some people planned to infiltrate the tea party protests and say ridiculously stupid things during interviews. The goal: make the protesters look "more dumb" (yes, Jessica, I did learn this week from you that "dumber" isn't an actual word) than they actually are. You might think that statement is offensive, but I've seen the signs...these people need to hire spell-checkers. Anyway, the "Crash the Tea Party" movement wants to dismantle the teabaggers through nonviolent means...and scenes that I hope to all that's holy will make it on TV. The organizer said, "Every time we have someone on camera saying that Barack Obama isn't an American citizen, we want someone sitting next to him saying, 'That's right, he's an alien from outer space!'" But he was also quick to point out that not ALL teabaggers have serious mental and social issues. "Do I think every member of the tea party is a homophobe, racist or a moron? No, absolutely not," he said. "Do I think most of them are homophobes, racists or morons? Absolutely." Let's see what the teabaggers said in response: "Gandhi's quote is one we understand: 'First they ignore you, then they ridicule you, then they fight you, then you win." Really!? GANDHI??? True, Mohandas Gandhi (I ASSUME that's the Gandhi they're referring to) let his followers in anti-tax movements and civil disobedience. He also sometimes FASTED for his cause. I've seen some of these protesters...fasting for them is only getting TWO Denny's Grand Slam breakfasts every morning instead of THREE. In fact, Gandhi led his followers on a march in 1930 to protest the tax on salt. That march...lasted 240 MILES! Just THINKING about 240 miles gets these teabaggers winded. Gandhi had a dedication to his cause that the teabaggers will never have. Anybody notice we really didn't have a tea party movement until President Obama was elected? Until the first BLACK PRESIDENT was elected? Remember how people bitched up and down about THAT? Gandhi stood for peace and harmony across ALL religions and ethnicities. Yes, teabaggers, that includes the whites and blacks getting along. So before you expound your platform using a message from Gandhi, why not do your homework first...and while you're at it, check a dictionary to make sure the ONE WORD ON YOUR SIGN IS SPELLED CORRECTLY:



Let's get some more perspective on the tea party movement from Jon Stewart:

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Tea America
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Tea Party

Also this week, President Obama made a move to get nuclear weapons out of the world. Once more...Jon Stewart:

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
A Farewell to Arms
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Tea Party

That's a little shout-out to those of you who read this blog and like science.

But let's not focus entirely on politics this week. Just days ago, it was announced Conan O'Brien will be returning to late-night...on the late-night television powerhouse, TBS. Yes, THAT TBS, which you watch for reruns of "The Office" and "Family Guy," as well as classic uproarious comedies like "The Bill Engvall Show" and "Tyler Perry's House of Payne." And don't forget the steady stream of big-screen blockbusters from such classic actors as Ben Affleck and Mel Gibson. FINALLY, TBS will get its own late-night talk show, a first for...wait, what???...TBS already HAS a late-night talk show?...who's George Lopez?...oh, THAT guy...they gave HIM his own show?...and why I am still stuck with this blo...well, I'm OCCASIONALLY funny!...well, at least Conan won't bump Lopez like Leno did to Cona...WHAT???...Conan's bumping Lopez??? Yes, that's right! Conan's new show will likely start in November at 11pm...which bumps Lopez to midnight (eastern time). Lopez is taking it well. He says he called Conan when the deal was being discussed and welcomed him to the network, knowing he'd probably be bumped. Lopez also said (I'm not kidding) it's a Latino dream to go to work an hour later.

Hey, I was checking out Google Earth the other day of...I think it was New York City...and I saw something so weird, I recorded it on my computer for you to check out:

Satellite Car Chase from Honest Directors on Vimeo.

Okay, I kid. That's actually Google Earth-ography with some computer animation. Hey, come on! Give me some amensty!

-B-