So, stop me if you heard this one: Sarah Palin's daughter, Bristol, the star of Disney Channel's remake of "Knocked Up," (joking) is separating from her baby-daddy, Levi Johnston. Yes, that SOUNDS like old news. The truth is they got back together a few weeks ago...and this week Bristol left him AGAIN. Turns out an ex-girlfriend of Levi's is pregnant and Bristol thinks it's his. Yes, I'm sure you're all shocked that Levi Johnston impregnated a girlfriend. Seriously, dude? Never heard of a condom? If you like, I'll give you a vasectomy for FREE! Am I qualified to give you a vasectomy? Define "qualified"...and "vasectomy."
Not a lot of awesome news this week, though the U.S. Senate DID confirm Elena Kagan as the next justice of the Supreme Court. There was also a major judge's ruling in California:
| The Daily Show With Jon Stewart | Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c | |||
| Californigaytion | ||||
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I LOVE when Sarah Palin opens her mouth. It's usually about her not reading something...magazines, etc.
It's a dark day for the state of Tennessee. Basil Marceaux (dot-com) lost his bid to become the state's Republican governor. It was close, though. Out of 700,000+ voters, he got about 3,500 votes. That close. So, in honor of the man whose name I didn't know until two weeks ago...
I don't really know what went wrong. He even got a bump on Jimmy Kimmel:
Ah, yes, you can plant a lot of grass in California that you can sell for fuel...after all, it's LEGAL out there.
You know what makes me angry? Congress. I swear they don't have a clue what they're doing in DC. Case in point:
| The Daily Show With Jon Stewart | Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c | |||
| I Give Up - 9/11 Responders Bill | ||||
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That makes about as much sense as all of the TV coverage given to the wedding of a man and his horse last weekend...wait, I'm being told that horse has a name: Chelsea Clinton. Yes, under the "Who Gives A Shit?" news section (it's on the last page of your local paper), some poor blind bastard took Chelsea off her grateful parents' hands. And, again, was all that TV coverage NECESSARY??? I mean REALLY???...
| The Daily Show With Jon Stewart | Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c | |||
| Wedding of the Decade of the Century of the Millennium | ||||
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Ah, Fox News...showing yourself worthy of that front row seat in the White House briefing room. That's a change I CAN'T believe in...THIS, however, is:
-B-
1 comment:
I think it's your sunscreen... I used yours too and also got burned... but then I think the beer haze fogged up my remembering to reapply. either way I bet we're a matching shade of pale turned skin cancer... wait... does Pantone make a swatch for that?
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